Saturday, December 31, 2011

Coco Chanel's fashion tips

I have dusted off my computer keyboard and am ready for a new year of exciting and edifying blog posts. Oh, and funny.... can't forget funny. These are my hopes, mind you, not promises.

First of all, a big thank you to my dear friend Mae West for her guest blog yesterday. So kind of her to take the time. Dear, dear Mae. So well-meaning but just a little, well, shall we say "blunt"? However, here I am writing again, so her post was a success.

I know that many of you are waiting for fashion advice from me so that you will know how to dress for New Year's Eve.  For those of you on the other side of the International Date Line, I'm so sorry I didn't get to you in time.  I can only hope that you didn't look TOO tacky last night.  I have called in an expert today to help me: Miss Gabrielle "Coco" Chanel.

Coco recommends wearing every single necklace you own at the same time, especially if you are trying to cover up the top of an ugly dress.  Try to find a really big wristwatch to wear around your waist.  Coco reminds everyone to be careful when placing a pin on your hat. She accidently stuck this one right through the top of her head and has been unable to remove the hat for years. And last but not least, wear a beautiful fragrance, like Chanel No. 2, or, if you can afford it, No. 2-1/2.

Thank you, Coco, and a very Happy New Year to you too!

Friday, December 30, 2011

Guest blogger: Mae West

Hey guys and gals. The one and only Mae West here, filling in today for the incredibly unreliable author of this blog. I once said "Anything worth doing is worth doing slowly", and apparently Ms. Blogger thought I was referring to her. Ha! She was the farthest thing from my mind! So I'm here to light a firecracker under her. If you're going to write, get on with it!! I've been things and seen places and so has Ms. Blogger, and the world needs to hear from us, probably. We are entirely too interesting to hide our lights under a bucket.

If Ms. Blogger does not take up my challenge to become a responsible emblogulator again, then all I've got to say is that her mother should have thrown her out and kept the stork.

Check back soon.  And Happy New Year!!!!!!!